Course Correct
We’ve spent the last three weeks in La Conner, Washington. The cutest little town on the western edge of Skagit County, facing Puget Sound. It has been a wonderful place to lay low, or “socially distance & chill” if you will.
We’ve spent our time exploring the area a bit, because even though I grew up less than two hours south of here, I really haven’t spent any extended time in this part of Washington. My paternal grandfather lived very close to here, but other than visiting him while I was young, and occasionally coming up for the Tulip Festival, my time north of Seattle has been limited.
There is a sacred place in my heart for the rocky beaches of Puget Sound, so that’s where we’ve been spending the majority of our outdoor time. Flipping rocks to find crabs, discovering and identifying different sea creatures, waving to seals swimming just offshore. It is such a special thing to share the highlights of my childhood with our kids. Swoon.
We finally seem to be getting some sort of rhythm going with homeschool, which has been nice. It feels good to be figuring out our strategy for what works and what doesn’t. Still a work in progress, for sure, but I’m hopeful.
Over the summer the boys developed an obsession with scootering, so we’ve also spent a lot of time exploring skate parks. The definite upside to creating our own schedule is that skate parks are completely empty mid-week when everyone else is in Zoom land. It’s nice to have a place to go where they can be completely free and take a break from worrying about masks and distancing.
On the subject of distancing, it’s actually been surprisingly easy to steer clear of other people because,
1) the weather has kept us inside a lot, and
2) all of the sane fulltime RV families have headed south for the winter, so there are no other kids around.
I know a lot of people are wondering how we are managing COVID restrictions while on the road, but it hasn’t been too challenging. In a lot of ways it’s easier than it was in our former life last spring. Most people in the campgrounds generally keep to themselves, and everyone is very respectful about following the rules of distancing and masking. Just like over the summer, it has made me really sad to be in Washington and not get together with friends and family, but such is life right now. We trust the guidance of infectious disease experts and will have endless playdates and give the longest hugs ever when this is all over. We saw a small handful of family when we first got here, but since things started to worsen we have been staying in our own bubble. I do the grocery store runs or pick up to-go food by myself, and the kids stay in the car or back at the RV with Brent. It’s not the same as staying home, but we don’t have one of those anymore, so we’re doing the best we can to do our part. This is such a difficult time for so many, sending love to all of you as we move through this together.
So, let’s talk about the weather… It’s not that I forgot how rainy it is in the Northwest, it’s just that I’ve never experienced it while living in a 200sf space with seven other living organisms. Obviously I’m a sucker for learning lessons the hard way, because I can’t say we weren’t warned. When I shared our itinerary (slowly working our way through Western Washington and down the Oregon Coast through Oct/Nov/Dec) with other friends who actually know stuff about RV life, they all gently tried to encourage us to consider a warmer/dryer path. To which we exclaimed, “don’t try to come at me with your logic, damnit, we’ll be fine!”
Well, I’m here to tell you, we’re not fine. It is wet as hell. Our space has become overrun with muddy paw prints and damp clothes hanging from every possible hook.
It’s musty in here, y’all.
And also, being in such close and constant contact with this many other humans is not good for my mental health. Just ask anyone I’ve talked to recently.
In one such recent phone conversation, after fleeing from the RV and diagnosing myself with a panic attack (Googled it. Totally legit.), my friend Kacky lovingly reminded me that I MAKE THE SCHEDULE and THE SCHEDULE CAN BE CHANGED.
Why can I not remember this?! What in the hell has happened in my life that causes me to adhere to completely arbitrary conditions that I MYSELF HAVE SET? (Still sitting with that one).
The purpose of this year was to chase joy, and things ain’t feeling so joyful right now. It is cold and wet outside, and while I’m willing to bundle up and brave it to preserve my own sanity, I cannot get the kids to embrace hours of outdoor play in the freezing rain.
They’ve revolted.
As a result, we’re all going a little stir crazy. Scratch that, we’re all going A LOT stir crazy.
So guess what… time to course correct. (Thanks for the kick in the pants, Kack).
We’re completely throwing out the plan we had for the next few months. Puget Sound is my happy place and it is gorgeous here, so while I’m sad to be leaving the area earlier than planned, I know it’s the right thing. We’re going to spend the next week on the Olympic Peninsula and then have a quiet RV-style Thanksgiving by ourselves near Mt. Hood in Oregon. After that we’ll be heading straight south.
Warmer weather here we come.
Not sure of the exact itinerary, but I’m learning to be ok with that. Baby steps.
So that’s the travel related stuff, but I also wanted to share some emotional/energetic stuff I’ve been working through around Fear lately. I’m including it here in the hopes that it might be helpful to anyone experiencing similar struggles.
There is a lot of Fear floating around right now. I know we all feel it.
I generally notice it in my body first, I feel tense or jittery, my stomach feels unsettled. I also notice myself being cranky and short-tempered, and reaching for the glass of wine earlier and earlier in the day. For me it started to become almost unbearable, and I had to take a hard look at how my own thoughts and actions were playing into the fear I was experiencing. I couldn’t remain in the headspace I was in, both for my own health and for the health of those around me. Something had to give. Once I was willing to acknowledge it, it was time to do the work.
I’m going to share here some of the things that have been instrumental in bringing me closer to peace over the past couple weeks, maybe if you are in a similar place you will find something that resonates:
I took a deep dive back into my meditation practice. I’ve gotten away from it over the past few months, and it shows. For me, the path to peace is always coming back to finding the stillness within myself. I’m so grateful to be able to count on this tool. It’s not always easy to find your way back (or start from the beginning), but once you do it will always be there waiting to comfort and guide you.
I turned off the news. Ever since canceling cable a few years ago, we have not been big news watchers. After cutting the cord, our eyes were opened to how stress-inducing it had been to have the constant noise in the background, and we’ve never missed it since. I generally stay up to date through print articles from a wide variety of news sources, but after getting the gist of things I move on. Cut to November 3rd when I found myself live-streaming various news outlets almost constantly for days on end. The shift in my psyche was immediate. Reality feels stranger than fiction right now, and I could not stop watching the train wreck. At some point, Brent actually staged an intervention and forced the phone out of my hand. I’m grateful for this reminder, though, because it really clicked with me that this is where we sit as a society right now. We are being blasted with a firehose of media (news, social, fake, what have you…) coming from all directions, and it is so easy to find yourself down the rabbit hole with no way out. I had to turn it off. I had to find my way back to myself. Back to what I know is real. I’m not saying we should stop paying attention, that’s not it. I’m just saying we need to be VERY conscious of what and how much we are consuming, and start setting limits for ourselves. It is not healthy to live staring at a screen (or listening as background noise), ingesting a constant cyclone of information and opinions. And also, our kids are watching/noticing/imitating. Cut the noise. (This especially applies if you spend your time spreading verifiably false memes and doing Google image searches to “investigate” conspiracy theory breadcrumbs dropped by an unknown puppet master. You are in a cult. Snap out of it.).
This is kind of specific, but my sweet sister-in-law recommended a book that has been an excellent reminder of how to shift into operating from a place of Love rather than Fear. I’ve done some work/reading around this in the past and have found it to be such a simple (and yet difficult to master) foundation for living. Even after years of reading books on sprituality and healing, I’ve never been drawn to Gabby Bernstein’s work (even though I know she’s super popular). But when, in casual conversation, Heather mentioned she was finding The Universe Has Your Back to be a comforting resource, it immediately found its way into my shopping cart. I’ve learned that when someone close to me makes a book recommendation it is almost always the exact thing I need in the moment, and it was certainly true in this case. I have been working very consciously on noticing when Fear is creeping in and shifting to perceiving the situation through Love instead, and the change I feel in my overall happiness has been immediate. Another great book on the subject is A Return To Love by Marianne Williamson.
I’m getting outside (safely). Every day, as much as I can, even when it’s raining. Nature is our most profound medicine, both physically and emotionally. Find a space where you can steer clear of others, wear a mask (not out of Fear, but out of Love), and get your ass out in nature.
So there you go, certainly not a magic bullet and it is a constant work in progress, but isn’t that true for everything? One foot in front of the other, my friends, we’ve got this. Sending love and wishes for a safe and healthy November to all of you.
xoxo
In Joy, Truth, & Love,
~lisa
