The Slam Jiggle
The view from our Waldport, Oregon oasis.
Sometimes I forget how little we knew about RV’s before we bought Bucky. And I also forget that most of you reading this are not of the RV world, and as such, are unfamiliar with the details and oddities that have now become routine for us.
Let me fill you in on the game all RVers play while driving. It’s a fun one! It’s called:
“WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?”
Other variations include:
“WHAT JUST FELL?”
“WHAT THE HELL IS THAT RATTLING?”
“OH FUCK, THE REFRIGERATOR IS OPEN.”
“WHERE THE HELL IS THAT WATER COMING FROM?”
And my most recent, personal favorite:
“GODDAMNIT, THE STAIRS ARE OUT AGAIN.”
RV life is like a constant game of whack-a-mole, and never is this more true than while driving. Shit is in a constant state of falling/breaking/rattling; the opportunities to use our problem solving skills are endless.
As stated above, our most recent source of road fun has come from the automatic stairs that descend when the door opens, and retract when the door closes. There is something going on with the sensor, and they routinely descend when we hit a bump while driving.
Driving with your stairs down is serious rookie status.
It’s amateur hour.
It’s not super safe, but mostly just embarrassing.
It literally screams “WE HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE WHAT WE’RE DOING” as we drive down the road. Which is almost certainly why it has become Brent’s biggest pet peeve.
Therefore, it has become my job to attempt to retract the stairs while we continue doing 70 down the highway.
It’s super fun, you guys.
Through trial and error, we have eventually landed on the high tech solution I have affectionately dubbed…
The Slam Jiggle
Here is my carefully refined process:
Step 1: Sit on the interior stairs, bracing my feet against the door frame while gripping the stair rail for dear life as I unwisely unlock the door.
Step 2: Say a brief prayer while I hold the door open for approximately 20 seconds and watch my life flash before my eyes, as the whizzing freeway taunts me from below.
Step 3: Hope that the cat doesn’t use this opportunity for one of his many attempted escapes.
Step 4: Summon the energy of exhausted moms everywhere and slam the door closed with every ounce of my being.
Step 5: Jiggle the screen door frantically until the sensor finally decides to get off its lazy ass and DO ITS ONE JOB.
Step 6: Stairs lackadaisically retract.
Step 7: Return to my seat to enjoy the quiet serenity of life on the road.
I kid you not, as I’m writing this, the fucking stairs just popped out again.
Off I go to perform the The Slam Jiggle.
I’ll leave you with some pictures of our time on the Oregon Coast.
We dropped Bucky in Eugene, OR to have some repairs done (on myriad rattling/broken parts that defied our best troubleshooting attempts), and rented a cottage on the beach for a few days. It was so lovely, we all had a hard time leaving.
I noticed while we were there how much my mood shifts when we are in “vacation” mode. Since Bucky is our full-time home now, the vacation feels have worn off.
But out at the beach house, man, I was my BEST SELF. I was fully vibing on vacation energy and just KILLING the mom game.
“Absolutely sweetie, after I finish making you these gourmet pancakes with syrup I tapped directly from the maple tree, let’s sit down and play hours of games together.”
Anyone else feel me on this? I don’t even recognize myself on vacation. Who is this person with endless patience and the ability to fully exist in every moment?
#lifegoals: Create a life that we don’t need a vacation from. Be vacation-mom-tastic in every day life.
Still working on it, my friends.
Still working on it.
In Joy, Truth, & Love,
~lisa
